A couple of blonde men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard.

A couple of blonde men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the blonde men walked in the office and said, “We need some four-by-twos.”

The clerk said, “You mean two-by-fours, don’t you?”

The man said, “I’ll go check,” and went back to the truck. He returned a minute later and said, “Yeah, I meant two-by-fours.”

“All right.

How long do you need them?”

The customer paused for a minute and said, “I’d better go check.”

After a while, the customer returned to the office and said, “A long time.

We’re gonna build a house.”

A truck was traveling through town. When the driver stopped at a red light, a blonde jumped out of her car, ran up to the driver of the truck, and said, “Mr.

you’re losing part of your load”. She jumps back into her car and follows the truck to the next light.

She jumps out of car and runs up to the driver’s window, “Mr.

you’re losing part of your load.”

The same thing happens for 7 stops, finally the 8th stop, the blonde came running up to the truck driver’s window, before she could say anything, the driver said,

“MA’AM, THIS IS WINTER IN MAINE, I’M DRIVING A SALT TRUCK…….”

A blonde in a bar is hunched over her martini spearing at the olive with a cocktail stick. A dozen times the olive eludes her until a man sitting next to her grabs the stick and skewers it for her. ‘That’s the way to do it,’ he says.

‘Big deal,’ replies the blonde.

‘You’d never have got it unless I’d tired it out first.’

Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat. The driver blonde turned to her friend and said, “You know,it’s blondes like that that give us a bad name!”

To this, the other blonde replies, “I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I’d go out there and drown her.”

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger.

First Blonde: “I can’t seem to get this door unlocked!”

Second Blonde: “Well you better hurry up. It’s starting to rain and the top is down!”

Related Posts

I Came Home After An 18-Hour Shift And Found My Daughter Sleeping. After A Few Hours I Tried To Wake

I came home after an 18-hour shift and found my daughter sleeping. I came home after an 18-hour shift and found my daughter sleeping. After a few…

From Loneliness to Love: A Beautiful Bond Beyond Blood

When I retired at 64, the days felt painfully quiet. I had no spouse, no children, and no one who checked in on me. Out of habit…

No One Came to My Graduation. Days Later, My Mom Asked Me for $2,100 for My Sister—So I Sent $1. Then the Police Showed Up.

The University of Denver stadium shimmered in May sunlight, a blur of navy gowns and proud families waving phones in the air like digital torches marking their…

My Granddaughter Refused to Stay in the Car. When We Got Home, My Husband Took One Look at Us and Froze.

When I pulled up to Meadowbrook Elementary in my son’s silver Honda Accord, I was running exactly twelve minutes late. Traffic had been heavier than expected, and…

“I Answered an Emergency Call as a Paramedic — The Patient Was My Wife”

At thirty-four years old, after eight years as a paramedic in Chicago’s South Side, Tristan Valentine had seen more death and trauma than most people witness in…

“You can sit over there,” my sister said, pointing to an empty corner. Her husband snickered. Then the bill arrived—$1,800. I picked it up, smiled, and said, “Not my problem.”

I didn’t answer the calls in the parking lot. I let the cold do its work on my face and drove home with the radio off, the…